Uncertainty

By Matt Palmer

November 20, 2020

After a conspiracy to take his life was hatched, the Lord warned Lehi and told him to leave town. As we all know now, Lehi was ultimately led to the promised land and made the father of a branch of the tree of Israel. But this was not apparent to Lehi at the time he packed up and fled Jerusalem. Nephi records it this way: 

“And it came to pass that the Lord commanded my father, even in a dream, that he should take his family and depart into the wilderness… And it came to pass that he parted into the wilderness. And he left his house, and the land of his inheritance, and his gold, and his silver, and his precious things, and took nothing with him, save it were his family, and provisions, and tents, and departed into the wilderness” (1 Nephi 2:2-4).

It wasn’t until they had travelled three days into the wilderness that the Lord told Nephi that the journey would end in a choice land of promise (1 Nephi 2:20).

The Lord knew all along what the end was. But Lehi didn’t leave Jerusalem as the first step of a long journey to a better place. Lehi left everything behind and uprooted his family simply to venture out into the unknown to await further instruction. This pattern repeats throughout scripture. In my personal scriptures, the most cross-referenced phrase is the one that captured Lehi’s faith and willingness to labor under uncertainty: “into the wilderness.” Consider some examples:

1. “And it came to pass that the Lord commanded Jared, his brother, and their families] that they should go forth into the wilderness, into that quarter where there never had man been. And it came to pass that the Lord did go before them, and did talk with them as he stood in a cloud, and gave direction whither they should travel” (Ether 2:5).
2. “And it came to pass that the Lord did warn me, that I, Nephi, should depart from them and flee into the wilderness, and all those who would go with me… And all those who would go with me were those who believed in the warnings and the revelations of God; wherefore, they did hearken to my words. And we did take our tents and whatsoever things were possible for us, and did journey in the wilderness for the space of many days. And after we had journeyed for the space of many days we did pitch our tents” (2 Nephi 5:5-7).
3. The first Mosiah, before he was made king of the joint people of Zarahemla, was “warned of the Lord that he should flee out of the land of Nephi, and as many as would hearken unto the voice of the Lord should also depart out of the land with him, into the wilderness – And it came to pass that he did according as the Lord had commanded him. And they departed out of the land into the wilderness, as many as would hearken unto the voice of the Lord. And they were admonished continually by the word of God; and they were led by the power of his arm, through the wilderness until they came down into the land which is called the land of Zarahemla” (Omni 1:12-13).
4. “And his voice was unto me: Abraham, Abraham, behold, my name is Jehovah, and I have heard thee, and have come down to deliver thee, and to take thee away from thy father’s house, and from all thy kinsfolk, into a strange land which though knowest not of” (Abraham 1:16).

There is much to learn through a study of the Lord sending His servants into the wilderness, when this happens, what befalls them, and what blessings they receive when they are willing to venture out. This phrase appears again and again in the scriptures, especially the Book of Mormon. This is a type of things that will be asked of our generation, particularly those who “believe in the warnings and the revelations of God,” as did Nephi and his people. However, there are other ways the Lord sends us into the wilderness of uncertainty. I am comforted and encouraged by the stories of the great and noble ones struggling bravely under uncertainty. 

One of my favorite stories is Jonathan and his armor bearer smiting the Philistines. After Jonathan and Saul won relatively small victory over the Philistines, the Philistines came with an overwhelming show of force. “The Philistines gathered themselves together to fight with Israel, thirty thousand chariots, and six thousand horsemen, and people as the sand which is on the sea shore in multitude…When the men of Israel saw that they were in a strait (for the people were distressed,) then the people did hide themselves in caves, and in thickets, and in rocks, and in high places, and in pits” (1 Samuel 13:5-6). 

Jonathan, however, was willing to take a chance. “Jonathan said to the young man that bare his armour, come, and let us go over to the garrison of these uncircumcised: it may be that the Lord will work for us: for there is no restraint to the Lord to save by many or by few” (1 Samuel 14:6). It appears that Jonathan felt impressed to go fight all of these Philistines, just he and his servant, without knowing beforehand the outcome when he says, “it may be that the Lord will work for us…” Jonathan and his armor bearer became the means by which the Lord miraculously delivered Israel. They killed twenty men quickly, and terror overcame the Philistines, so much that the earth shook beneath them, and Saul’s army took heart and won a decisive victory. We have no reason to believe that Jonathan knew how this would turn out at the moment he decided to put his life in the Lord’s care and attack the Philistines.

I think of Alma and Amulek watching as the believers were burned as they were forced to watch, as recorded in Alma Chapter 14. Amulek proposed that they work a miracle and preserve the lives of the people that were dying painful deaths by fire. But the Spirit told Alma that these deaths were the plan and that Alma was not to act. Amulek’s response tells us much about his character and determination to serve: “Behold, perhaps they will burn us also.” I read some fear in Amulek’s response as he wrestles with the uncertainty of that moment and whether or not he will join the other believers in the flames. But he never waivers. His dear friend Alma responds, “Be it according to the will of the Lord. But, behold, our work is not finished; therefore they burn us not” (Alma 14:8-13). Alma and Amulek were willing to burn for their testimonies. 

We learn something of Paul’s bravery on his trip to Jerusalem. He told the Elders of the church in Ephesus, “I go bound in the spirit unto Jerusalem, not knowing the things that shall befall me there: save that the Holy Ghost witnesseth in every city, saying that bonds and afflictions abide me. But none of these things move me, neither count I my life dear unto myself…” (Acts 20:22-24). Paul’s words to these men sound like final parting words, that perhaps he believed he may never emerge from Jerusalem again. “And when he had thus spoken, he kneeled down, and prayed with them all. And they all wept sore, and fell on Paul’s neck, and kissed him, sorrowing most of all for the words which he spake, that they should see his face no more” (Acts 20:36-38).

As Paul travelled, he was warned by those possessed with the gift of prophecy. In Cyprus, there were disciples “who said to Paul through the Spirit, that he should not go up to Jerusalem” (Acts 21:4). In Caesarea, Agabus the prophet “took Paul’s girdle, and bound his own hands and feet, and said, thus saith the Holy Ghost, so shall the Jews at Jerusalem bind the man that owneth this girdle, and shall deliver him into the hands of the Gentiles. And when we heard these things, both we, and they of that place besought him not to go up to Jerusalem” (Acts 21:10-12). Paul’s response? “What mean ye to weep and to break mine heart? For I am ready not to be bound only, but also to die at Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus” (Acts 21:13).[1]

As we know, Paul went to Jerusalem, where he was arrested, charged with crimes, beaten, held in prison, and otherwise had a crummy time. Only after Paul had suffered all of these things, and a conspiracy was made among forty men to kill him, the Lord came to him and told him whether his journey was headed to an imminent violent death. “And the night following the Lord stood by him, and said, be of good cheer, Paul: for as thou has testified of me in Jerusalem, so must thou bear witness also at Rome” (Acts 23:11). Everything Paul did to that point, he did willing to die in Jerusalem and not knowing whether or not that would be the case for him. 

As Paul, Amulek, and Jonathan were willing to die for the Lord, Ether was willing to live and suffer for Him. Consider that Ether was the only one of the two remaining survivors of what was once a great and numerous nation. The only other, Coriantumr, would have probably killed Ether at first sight. The land was rotting beneath the heaps of dead, unburied bodies torn apart in the final internecine war that left Ether a man isolated. He had no hopes of companionship or any sociality. There was no economy left to sustain him. All he had to look forward to was scavenging the spoils of a war with no winners. In that context, he writes his final words: “Whether the Lord will that I be translated, or that I suffer the will of the Lord in the flesh, it mattereth not, if it so be that I am saved in the kingdom of God” (Ether 15:34). Ether had no idea how the rest of that life would be spent, but he faced it all with perfect stoicism and fixed his thoughts on heavenly rewards. 

It would have been easy enough for the Lord to tell these men that things would be alright. Each of them proved fully capable of hearing the voice of the Lord. But the Lord withheld information and made these great prophets blindly feel their way through these trials. Examples of this abound, and there are exceptions to this rule. But perhaps we expect too much from the prophets at times. Perhaps they were more like us most of the time, living out their plan one step at a time, but fully embracing the consequences of their discipleship, whether it took them to the promised land or the grave? 

Alma quoted the prophet Zenos: “Thou art merciful, O God, for thou hast heard my prayer, even when I was in the wilderness; yea thou wast merciful when I prayed concerning those who were mine enemies, and thou didst turn them to me” (Alma 33:4). There is wisdom in embracing uncertainty and commending ourselves into the hands of Christ. We are not alone in the wilderness. At some point, the Lord will call each of us into our own wilderness. He will be there to guide us, and the journey will be for our good. 

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[1] Acts 21 is worthy of careful study about the gift of prophecy, priesthood authority, and individual agency. I find a few things particularly significant. First, Philip the Evangelist “had four daughters, virgins, who did prophecy.” Verses 8-9. This did not appear to be out of place among early Christian believers, to have young women noted for their gift of prophecy. Next, those who warned Paul not to go to Jerusalem prophesied accurately and by the gift of the Holy Ghost. The text specifically notes that they prophesied by the Spirit. Verses 4, 11. Not only that, they prophesied by the Spirit to one in authority in the church. This is anathema to those of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, who have strong cultural beliefs about the pyramid-shaped scope of stewardship and revelation. The Holy Ghost clearly gives these people true, prophetic information that is outside the scope of their stewardship, as understood in modern terms. But, the Holy Ghost notwithstanding, Paul ignores their counsel, and he was right to do so! Paul had his own agency and his own revelation to follow. He went to Jerusalem and suffered the things the Holy Ghost said he would. An exploration of this chapter would make for its own essay.